Dan is a world-famous geologist / celebrity intimacy coordinator based out of rural North Carolina. Having previously lived in central Manhattan, he now enjoys the ease with which he can avoid any and all human interaction simply by hiding amongst the sheaves of his neighbors’ corn whenever visitors come a-knockin’. He wants you to enjoy tonight’s production, but humbly requests you not look at him on stage, as eye contact makes him anxious. He once bought a camera and trained his pet buzzard to click the button on it. You can see Dan’s buzzard’s work, if you so choose, by searching DanBeckmannPhography on FB or IG or good old Google. Just don’t tell the buzzard that Dan is taking credit for his work. He feels guilty about having made you read all of this, and as repentance, is offering complimentary brandy eggnog at the concessions counter with code #GetNoggedAtCrane.